COVID Coma

The COVID Coma is Real

Last week I spent some time on a retreat with some old friends, away from home and out in public. There is much to be gained from old friends and new adventures, but the shock from emerging from two years of COVID Coma into public brings all kinds of awareness, some good and some surprising.

Emerging back into polite society after over two years of limited interaction and virtual isolation is not easy. I was just with a group of friends that have known each other for over 25 years. We know each other pretty well but getting back together after two years apart had a few bumps. 

You’re Not the Only One…

We leveled out pretty quickly with some honest conversation. One of my friends confessed that she is a lot more snarky, another said she found herself being very sarcastic and short with people.  I too admitted to having a shorter fuse and harder time accepting others missteps. Thank goodness we talked,  I thought I was the only one. 

“There’s some international agreement that the situation may not just be one where people have forgotten their manners, or are out of practice because everyone had to stop shaking hands for a while.” Belinda Luscomb, Time Magazine, October 15, 2021

Time magazine reports, “ Americans appear to have forgotten their niceties, especially with those whose job it is to assist them. Lawyers are reporting ruder clients. Restaurants are reporting ruder clients. Flight attendants, for whom rude clients are no novelty, are reporting mayhem. “

What is the COVID Coma?

The Massachusetts restaurant association has launched a campaign to ask patrons to be patient, things are coming back but slowly. Nevertheless, people have been so rude that at least one restaurant in the area felt obliged to close for a day to give its employees time to recover from the impoliteness of the guests.

It appears that the threat of catching a life threatening disease combined with isolation and life altering changes, like working at home, and almost over night being deprived of social interaction have left people angry, and hungry for conversation. Ironically people jump to engage,  but are so out of practice that filters and behavioral restraints are practically non-existent.  

“We’re going through a time where physiologically, people’s threat system is at a heightened level,” says Bernard Golden, a psychologist and the author of Overcoming Destructive Anger. “This period of threat has been so long that it may have had a damaging effect on people’s mental health, which for many has then been further debilitated by isolation, loss of resources, the death of loved ones and reduced social support. “

Shorter tempers, greater anxiety, COVID PTSD, depression, anger, an increased demand for mental health services, and mean behavior are some of the fall out of being in our COVID cave. 

Finding the COVID Coma Cure

So what’s to be done? First, know that you are not alone if any of the above behaviors sound familiar to you. Second, rein in your expectations. Things are moving back toward normal, but it will be a new normal. Don’t expect things to be exactly as they were BC (before COVID.)

We must be accountable for our own actions.   Being polite is one thing, not being rude is another.  Being conscious of the way each of us present ourselves  is the first step towards improving social interaction everywhere. Here are some more tips:

• Think before you speak. Take a split-second to decide whether something you say might negatively affect someone around you.
• Monitor your voice. Keeping track of the tone, speed and volume of your voice can go a long way towards preventing unintentional rudeness.
• Demonstrate empathy. Empathetic people are in tune with the other person’s feelings and provide appropriate feedback. 
• Be aware of the conversation flow. If someone says something you feel is rude  take a step back before blowing up and ask, “Hey, what’s going on?” 
• Let others speak. Listening is a skill, as real as any other. If you don’t want to be rude, you’ll need to listen and be present. 
• Consider others opinions. Disagreement is the first step to anger but it  can easily be avoided if you try to look at the conversation from both perspectives.

It may be that the ultimate cure for the COVID Coma is patience. Patience with yourself is certainly in order. Patience with others is also necessary. And try to remember:

“Patience is not simply the ability to wait – it’s how we behave while waiting.” Joyce Meyer 

Related Articles:

• Coping with Covid
• Pandemic Issues for Seniors

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