Reciprocate! How to Renew Yourself by Being Grateful

In previous articles we have covered several aspects and methods of self-renewal. In this article we conclude our self-renewal series with “Reciprocate! How to Renew Yourself by Being Grateful”

To reciprocate is to make an equivalent exchange intended to acknowledge or pay back (or pay forward) what one has received from another. I am a firm believer that when someone does something for us, it needs to be acknowledged and/or paid back.

“Thank you,” is the least recognition owed to someone who has helped you. It might be your spouse getting you a cup of coffee. It might be a workmate helping you on a project. Maybe it’s a stranger picking up something you dropped. Saying “Thanks” is the least you can do. You also could think about returning the favor. In addition, you can pay forward by helping somebody else. You could volunteer your time, your skills or your money. You could give to others. This will help you renew yourself and realize how abundant your own life is.

Why Reciprocate?

The great thing about reciprocating is that it not only makes the person you are thanking happy, but it provides many benefits to you, both physical and emotional. By saying “Thank you,” we create a positive emotional state for ourselves. It increases our happiness and self-worth. It is a boost to our self-esteem. Appreciation and gratitude for others’ support, contributions and work result in improving our personal well-being. It is like a basket that refills faster than you can empty it.

“A new study shows that expressing gratitude affects not only the grateful person, but anyone who witnesses it. Researchers studying gratitude have found that being thankful and expressing it to others is good for our health and happiness. Not only does it feel good, it also helps us build trust and closer bonds with the people around us.These benefits have mostly been observed in a two-person exchange—someone saying thanks and someone receiving thanks. Now, a new study suggests that expressing gratitude not only improves one-on-one relationships, but could bring entire groups together—inspiring a desire to help and connect in people who simply witness an act of gratitude.” greatergood.berkeley.edu

Showing gratitude not only affects the people involved in the “thank you,” it affects those who see it happen. They are more apt to reach out and express their gratitude–and on and on…

Gratitude Case Study

One night, I was eating dinner with my brother in a small but busy local restaurant. He happened to be wearing his Vietnam Veteran cap. The waiter came and told us that someone had paid for his dinner and said, “Thank you for your service.” I was very grateful as I saw the effect on my brother. Since then, not only have I done the same thing several times, but I know one other table next to ours paid for someone’s dinner that night. The more we reciprocate what someone else has done, the more gratitude we show, the more we receive.

How to Renew Yourself by Being Grateful

An attitude of thankfulness has to be developed. If you have not been in a situation growing up where thankfulness and gratitude are encouraged, showing gratitude can be hard to do. You have to change from an entitlement attitude where you believe people owe you things just because you are you, to a feeling down deep that when good things happen a thank you is called-for and delivered. It takes work to form a neurological pathway to change the way you see things.

Sending thank you notes can give you an immediate feeling of positivity. Commit to keeping a gratitude journal where you reflect in short answers or longer reflections about things you are grateful for. You may find it takes longer to reflect on changes of attitude or circumstance. Gratitude journals are highly recommended for many aspects of life’s journey.

Benefits of Reciprocating

The following are eight benefits of developing a reciprocal attitude. They demonstrate how you can renew yourself by being grateful. A reciprocal attitude can make a profound difference in your life. Practice it ‘til it’s perfect, then move the bar higher. Expressing gratitude to others (or to God when appropriate):

Makes you more adaptable and resilient to the daily stresses and frustrations we all encounter.
Improves self-care. Gratitude allows you to become more aware of the good things in your life. This in turn promotes good
Improves sleep. Reflecting in a gratitude journal could help you sleep more soundly and longer.
Eases depression and encourages a sense of well-being.
Promotes better health. You have lower blood pressure and an improved immune system when you remain in the moment and notice and express gratitude.
Harnesses your willpower. Gratitude, meditation and reflection on your food as you eat slows your pace and helps with overeating.
Grows your self-esteem. As your awareness and gratitude grows so do your positive feelings about yourself.
Strengthens your relationships. Showing gratitude by saying, “Thank you,” not only let’s your friends know you appreciate them, it tightens the bond that links you.

Gratitude With Attitude

Reciprocation can change your life and it can change others’ lives as well. Try an experiment. Spend one day saying “Thank you,” and showing gratitude to others. Really think about it, reach out to others and thank them. You will find that you

Show your gratitude by buying lunch for someone. Or make phone calls to people who helped you in the past. Then before you go to bed reflect on the day. How do you feel? Record that feeling and remember it as you make each day a better day for you and your family.