In my Handling Mistakes article, the last tip we listed was to let go and move on. I heard from many readers who said that was easier said than done. So, let’s discuss “how to let go and move on from mistakes.” The past can shape the future, but it doesn’t dictate it – you make the final choice in how you move forward in your life.
Let Go and Move on from Mistakes
You can endlessly rethink events that have already happened. Anyone can dwell on memories of unpleasant situations from the past. You can refuse to let go of mistakes. But these approaches are unproductive and won’t get us anywhere. We must focus on what is the real self as opposed to the idealized self. No more “If only, if only.” We are human. Humans are not perfect, we make mistakes.
The more we wallow in these negative emotions without a proactive or solution-oriented mindset, the more we feed into them and let them dictate our lives. That’s when these emotions become unhelpful, destructive, and even “addictive” in some cases.
Here are important tips and advice for learning “let go” of your past mistakes.
Accept mistakes are a part of life.
Remember that everyone makes mistakes at times, you are no different. Life is full of trial and error. We often must experience pain before finally getting it right. That happens because we learn from mistakes.
What would happen If we made that first error and quit? A lot of people would be walking around with their shoes untied.
Get moving
If you are having trouble as you try to move on from mistakes, you may feel as if you are obsessing on the mistake. You can’t seem to get it out of your head. As soon as you notice you’re ruminating, try to distract yourself for a few minutes. Engage in an activity that’s short and mentally absorbing but not extraordinarily difficult. In some situations, you might be able to just refocus your attention on what you’re supposed to be doing. Physical activity, such as jogging or walking, breathing techniques, mindfulness or yoga can also calm a mind that’s prone to rehashing. The more often you can take control the easier it becomes to let go.
Practice reflection.
While it’s important not to dwell on our failures endlessly, taking the time to actively reflect on them is key to self improvement and self growth. Studies have shown hat when individuals write about a past mistake, it reduces their stress associated with the event and better equips them to handle new stressful events in the future. Writing about your failures will not only help you learn more from them, but also help you “let go” of them quicker and move on. Things to consider writing about
- Exactly what mistake did you make
- When did it happen? What was the situation?
- What aspects of the mistake were outside your control?
- How could you have prepared better before entering the situation?
- What did you learn
- How can you apply it in the future?
Make sure you end the writing process on a positive note. Focus on the main takeaway lessons from the experience.•
Be patient with yourself
It’s not easy to change yourself, especially not overnight. Understand that self-improvement is often a long-term process. Celebrate small wins and be aware of gradual progress. The dividends from that will multiply. Patience to allow yourself time to grow and let go is vital to being successful and moving on.
Zoom out
Life is a constantly unfolding process, no single event can dictate the rest of your life. Ask yourself, “ Really will this matter in a year or 5 or 10? If you look at the complete picture of your life, mistakes aren’t as big as we often think they are.
Forgive yourself and move on from your mistakes
You probably tried your best given the time and situation. Your best is always good enough. Are you judging yourself for what you did in the past based on what you know now? It’s possible that anyone else in your exact shoes would’ve made the same exact mistake. Forgive yourself like you would forgive a friend. Be as kind to yourself as you would a favorite member of your family. You matter. Once you start building yourself up again you can finally move on from your mistakesand seek happiness instead of being brought down by a past you cannot change.
At the end of the day, we must learn to live with our mistakes to the best of our ability and grow from them. The tips, tools, and advice mentioned above are a great starting point, but it will take consistent practice to become better at “letting go” of your mistakes and continuously putting your best foot forward. Your past has shaped who you are today, but only your actions starting NOW will shape who you become in the future. Who do you want to be?
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